then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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