Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
