the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
love makes seman taste better
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
