It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
