is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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