ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize