quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
