do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
