Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize