Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize