I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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