Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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