I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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