And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
