Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
