This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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