im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize