im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
