Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
