I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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