On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
