I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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