Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
