his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
