I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
