i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
