This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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