I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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