If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
