I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
