I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
