he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
