Whod you bang
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
So squirting runs in the family.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
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