SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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