Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
