So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
