please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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