I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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