I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
