Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
the day after is always just damage control
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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