Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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