I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize