Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
