Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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