I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
