Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
this will be a night to untag.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
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