So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
