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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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