Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
