out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
